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    写在临睡前

    可见我有多么早睡。来说说最近吧, 我迟早被自己整死,乏味和费解让我不太想忍受这秋的二三事。在尝试了自我分析之后,我放弃了第七种人格的答案——也许我本来就不应该在别人的见念中找寻自我。Virginia Woolf说 The man who is aware of himself is henceforth independent; and he is never bored,and life is only too short, and he is steeped through and through with profound yet temperate happiness. 我的理解是,找到自我就万事大吉,否则重则结果了自己,轻则无聊,狂喜狂怒,自怨自艾……

    也许这并不是闲来无事的人才有的忧愁,恰恰那些从来没有被自我这个问题所烦恼的人整日忙着也不知道在干些什么。我们人类从4岁开始就建立了自我意识,漫长的成长期中,我们做的更多是他人意识。有虐狂M,想破口大骂,但受虐的本性让他无法在发泄中找到出口,他只有更沉默,才能一边自虐一边享受其中。

    我们都在大大小小的压力中生活,带着侥幸逃脱的快感和审判来临前的恐惧。gx贼,鸟晴,mama,周同学,群群等结束司考,脱离苦海。

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    Zhang Zhenwrote:
    写在临死前。
    Sept. 21

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